You already know how to cook

And other reminders to listen to yourself

The other day, I caught myself deep in what to have for dinner thought — watching Instagram reels and stressing over what to cook for dinner.

None of it felt right. Too many ingredients, not the ones I had, was I eating enough protein, was it healthy enough and would it be toddler friendly! I was getting overwhelmed and not to be dramatic - lost.

Then I paused and realised:

I know how to cook.

Not in a sophisticated way, but in the way that matters. I’ve cooked hundreds of meals. I know what goes with what. I can trust my senses, make something up, and it’ll be just fine, maybe better than fine.

So why was I doubting myself? Why was I so desperate to find someone else to follow?

The recipe isn’t always the answer

That moment reminded me of something I often see in my therapeutic work.

Clients come in feeling stuck or unsure; full of self-doubt. They’ve read the books, listened to the podcasts, had therapy before and talked it out with friends. But they’ve lost touch with their own sense of knowing. That quiet inner voice that says: you’ve done this before — you know yourself better than anyone else does.

Therapy isn’t about being told what to do

When I work with people there isn't a recipe for success. Instead, we explore what’s already within you — instincts, patterns, wisdom, values — and how you might begin to trust those again. The path is not necessarily a straight line.

Sometimes life asks for improvisation. And that’s not a failure — it’s a skill.

A gentle reminder

Whether in the kitchen or in yourself, it’s okay to stop searching for the all the answers.

You probably already know more than you think. You’ve done this before. You can do it again.

Want to explore this further?

If you’re feeling stuck, self-doubting, or simply ready to reconnect with your own sense of knowing, I offer a warm, supportive space to explore what matters to you.

📍In-person sessions near Finsbury Park (from May)💻 Online sessions available UK-wide

👉 Visit clarepaynecounselling.com to find out more or book a free 20-minute intro call.